I wonder if he ever thinks about me?
HA. What a stupid question. OF COURSE he doesn’t! He’s moved away, gone out of my life, and chances are very good we will never see each other again. Fantasies of meeting in coffee shops serendipitously (spelling?) have faded from my hopes into vague distant memories of the past.
Well. Here’s the letter I never got to send to him.
I downloaded the Pirates soundtrack, just so I can think of you when I listen to it. On the bus, on the way to church, doing my homework; whenever I hear those first three notes and then the drunken cello playing, my heart instantly goes not to Johnny Depp, but to you. I remember your comedic moments with your best friend, the time I took your violin and I wasn’t supposed to have it, our one conversation (you told me to “go for it” when I said I wanted to take the stairs up)
I remember the look you gave me, after the last concert, when we met eyes as you were walking up. I couldn’t look away, now was my chance to smile and say congratulations. But instead I looked at you like an idiot and then kicked myself inwardly later. I missed that chance, and now I won’t ever get it back.
I hope things are going well for you.
I wish you nothing but happiness even though you probably don’t even know my name.
Keep smiling and I can’t wait to hear your songs on the radio.
